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4 Keys I Used To Overcome Porn, Lust, And Shame

Tom Crandall • Feb 19, 2020

4 Keys I Used To Overcome Porn, Lust, And Shame

The first time I saw pornography I was hooked.

My addiction to porn started when I was a teenager. It disrupted my relationship with God, shaped the way I saw myself, and shaped how I saw women. I was tormented by uncontrollable mood swings, rounds of depression, lust, and racing thoughts. Though I still believed in God, the sin I was living in opened a door for demons to torment me and control my life.

Pornography was never enough.

It always left me feeling ashamed, empty and wanting more. Towards the end of my teen years, I was awakened to the reality that what the world said would make me happy was a lie. I cried out to God for freedom, and I began to read my Bible and go to church.

When I encountered the love of God, He was so kind, so near and so graceful.

I learned that I was a sinner and Jesus died in my place to free me from this destructive life of addiction. As my heart was captured by Him I developed disgust and hatred for sin. In response to His love, my heart was moved to repentance and I was willing to do whatever it took to be free.

One day I went to my room, grabbed the porn that I developed a connection with for years, and tore it into a million pieces in the trash. I gave myself no ability to go back. I even made up my mind that I wouldn’t watch movies or listen to music with sexual messages.

My physical obedience brought about a spiritual breakthrough.

2 Corinthians 5:17 says, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” When I received Christ, I became a new creation, although many times I didn't feel like it. My mind, will, and emotions needed renewing by the Word of God and time in His Presence.

Here are 3 tools for stepping into freedom from pornography:

1. Renew your mind

Now that the porn was out of my life, I had to get the porn out of me. When I closed my eyes, all I could see where previous images. Neurological science proves that what we focus on can create physical grooves in our brains that thoughts flow through. I had to create new pathways in my brain and cut off the old ones.

I started spending time with God in prayer, worship and reading the Bible. The blood of Jesus became my fountain of life, washing my mind continually. The Holy Spirit worked in me a life of surrender, and I began to allow God to shape me. Read about Jesus in the Bible, and spend time giving God thanks for the cross where your sin nature was crucified, and your sins were washed away!

2. Allow God to love you in the midst of your pain

The grace of God is stronger than the deepest sin. No matter how long you’ve struggled, God loves you and will set you free. The voice of hopelessness will tell you that God is mad at you, disappointed in you and is just tolerating you—but that isn’t true. Jesus loves you unconditionally and His love never changes. 

Sit down and look God in the eyes until you stop hating yourself. Spend time letting God love you in the midst of your pain until you believe that He will never leave or forsake you. One encounter with His love will show you your true worth and value that the world can never give you.

3. Get in the light!

1 John 1:7 says, “But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin.” 

We cannot do this alone, we were created to need help from our community. Who can you tell about your struggle right now? Find someone who is trustworthy and walking in freedom from porn and open up to them. Be vulnerable. 

Practically, you can delete apps that represent temptation on your phone, and charge your phone away from your bed. In addition to taking these practical steps, remember that this is a spiritual battle as well, and the Holy Spirit will give you the power to overcome as you keep your eyes fixed on Jesus! 

My hope for you is that whether you just started your journey to freedom or you have been trying for a while, you would receive supernatural grace as you meditate on The Lord and His Word. You’re not alone, and I believe that you are fully able to step into the freedom that Christ purchased for you!
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By Tom Crandall 12 Apr, 2021
Can you imagine receiving a gift on Christmas—adoring the box and beautiful bow, yet never opening the gift? It’s possible to be in church for a lifetime and not receive the treasures of what’s been paid for. In the past few months I have found myself in a deep dive in understanding the simple message of the gospel. The Spirit of God has been highlighting different aspects of the cross, the blood of Jesus and the new nature that we have received as a result of it. I want to share 3 truths with you that have started to revolutionize my life in recent times: 1. Righteousness is a gift from God that can’t be earned—it must be received by faith. Righteousness means right standing with God—a position that no man can earn. The law reveals God’s holy nature, and man’s sinfulness. The law is good, and gives us the definition of sin, but can’t give life to anyone. Instead, it leaves us in a place of needing forgiveness and grace. It’s like a doctor that is able to diagnose a disease but unable to offer a cure. Jesus is the cure for the disease of sin and sickness that we all need. Many Christians try to earn their right standing before God with their good deeds and noble offerings, not realizing that Jesus has already paved the way for them. Their efforts are in vain and soon enough they burn out and wonder why they are not sensing God’s approval on their life. Self righteousness just leads to more self and focusing on sin management as the barometer for the righteousness you carry—a religious treadmill that never stops. We don’t live for righteousness, we live from it! In case you don’t have a relationship with God yet, you can click HERE to read my blog on “How to start a relationship with God”. If you are a child of God, you are righteous not because of what you do, but because of what Jesus has done for you on the cross. Meditate on these verses: 2 Corinthians 5:21 “For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.” Romans 5:17 “For if by the one man’s offense death reigned through the one, much more those who receive abundance of grace and the gift of righteousness will reign in life through the One, Jesus Christ.” Romans 5:1 “Therefore having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.” Romans 5:20 “Moreover the law entered that the offense might abound. But where sin abounded, grace abounded much more,” Peace is the result of trusting that God has made you righteous before you feel it, see it, or do anything to prove it. Focusing on our shortcomings and failures will never set us free, but only perpetuate more bondage. Looking to Jesus (John 3:14-16) is how we get free and receive the gift of righteousness. Activation: Ask yourself: Is there anything you need to surrender to Jesus? Take a few minutes to let the blood of Jesus wash you from the inside out. Spend some time meditating on the fact that you are already fully righteous before God, because of Jesus’ death and resurrection. If you are righteous in nature, how do you believe God sees you? Good or bad? Declaration: “Jesus, you are Lord of my life. Thank you that your blood was enough to make me fully right with you.” “I am standing pure and righteous before the throne of God right now, not because of what I did but because of what Jesus has done!” “I receive your peace you paid for in every area of my life.” 2. Faith in the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus has brought us into full union with Christ. Romans 6:4–5: “Therefore we were buried with Him through baptism into death, that just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life. For if we have been UNITED together in the likeness of His death, certainly we also shall be in the likeness of His resurrection,” United means to identify with, to be like, to be one with. We are in union, oneness with Christ! Our old sinful nature is nailed to the cross, buried in the grave and we are resurrected with Jesus—alive in Him! Just as a man and a woman getting married die to the single life and become one with their spouse, so we die to our old, sinful life and become one in spirit with Jesus. Ephesians 2:6 (NLT): “For he raised us from the dead along with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ Jesus.” Romans 6:11 “Likewise you also, reckon yourselves to be dead indeed to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Activation: Become aware of your union with Christ and take time to thank Him for being closer than the skin on your bones. See all temptation and sin as something outside of you. It is not who you are. Meditate on the reality that God lives in you on your best and worst day—He promised He would never leave you. Declaration: "I am hidden with Christ in God." "I have the mind of Christ." "I am one with Christ." “I am no longer separated from God. Every feeling of loneliness is a mere illusion, because I know that I am one with Christ in my spirit man!” 3. Our identity in Christ becomes a reality as we renew our minds. Oftentimes life happens and we don’t feel saved, at peace, or free. But God and His Word never change—we can come to Him just as we are at any time, in any situation, and He will receive us and transform us. It is so important to not interpret God’s word through the lens of our experience, but instead interpret our experiences through the lens of God’s Word. Your perception might be wrong, but His word never changes or fails. Romans 12:2 (NIV84): “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Ephesians 4:22–24 (NIV): “You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.” Galatians 5:24 (Passion Translation) “Keep in mind that we who belong to Jesus, the Anointed One, have already experienced crucifixion. For everything connected with our self-life was put to death on the cross and crucified with Messiah.” HERE is a blog called “Receiving Righteousness” that I believe will help you in the process of growing in your identity. The renewal of the mind happens as our faith aligns with Him by doing the following: Feasting on His Word Reviewing testimonies of what God has done Praise and worship Prayer Meditation Declaration Activation: Give God thanks for what He has accomplished on the cross for you. How is the Holy Spirit leading you to renew your mind with what Jesus has accomplished for you? Take time to receive the love of God, His grace, and His perception of you. Declaration: “My mind is continuously being renewed by the Word of God, and as a result my life is continuously growing to look more like Christ!” "I am a new creation." "I am covered by mercy, and empowered by grace to live bold in Christ!"
By Tom Crandall 05 Feb, 2021
People are convinced that God is angry, disappointed, punishing and judgmental. Let me assure you, the Bible proves, that is not the nature of God. Contrary to the world’s opinion God is actually holy, righteous, just and also loving, merciful, gracious, kind, forgiving and empowering. How can you know what God, the Father really looks like? By looking at Jesus! Jesus dealt with our inability to know the nature of God. He Himself said, “If you have seen me, you have seen the Father.” God looks like Jesus, because while Jesus was fully man, He was also fully God. Christ was not afraid of sinners, He was their friend. He never gave anyone an excuse as to why they cannot be healed, instead He healed everyone who was sick. Wherever He went, he brought freedom and deliverance to those who were bound. The life of Jesus points us to this truth: A good Father, like God will do anything for his kids, even if it means laying down his own life for their good. He gave up His only Son to give humanity true freedom. Many have not encountered a father like this, which is exactly why Jesus came; to reveal a heavenly Father who is better than anything we could imagine. He was a physical example of the love that God has for us. I want to encourage you today: No matter how hopeless you feel right now, this amazing Father loves you, and is right there with you to set you free! Meditate on Jesus and you’ll find the Father: Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” -John 14:12 Jesus covered sinners. Jesus healed the sick. Jesus accepted the rejected. Jesus set the oppressed free. Jesus forgave sin. Jesus removed shame. Jesus listened to people. Jesus gave hope to the hopeless. Jesus protected the vulnerable. Jesus comforted the broken-hearted. Jesus brought laughter and joy. Jesus brought peace to turmoil. Jesus revealed truth in the midst of lies. Jesus did miracles to provide for others. Jesus demonstrated the reality of another world. Jesus laid down His life so others could live. Jesus empowers us to live like Him. Everything Jesus modeled was a good Father. Activation: Get comfortable and take 3 minutes to imagine what the Father is like. Think about how He revealed Himself through Jesus. Are there any lies that you have believed about the nature of Father God? Write them down and leave them at the foot of the cross. Declaration: “I know that the Father loves me, because Jesus demonstrated it by dying on the cross!” “The Father’s embrace is the safest place in the world for me! I will not be afraid of punishment when I come to God, because I know Jesus has paid for all my mistakes."
By Tom Crandall 05 Feb, 2021
Over the past months I have been pondering on the subject of freedom. In today’s fast world we are inundated with options but do our choices produce real freedom? The world thinks freedom is the ability to do, say and think whatever you want, but that couldn’t be further from the truth! Living in lawlessness will make your soul sick, it will leave you asking “Isn’t there more to live for?” We all know of people who seemingly have it all. They are searching for freedom in money, friends, sex and success but when their head hits the pillow at night, they are left empty on the inside. True freedom is found in knowing God. We are designed to live in friendship with a Father who loves us. Never do I feel so free as when I experience the presence of God. Can you relate? That’s because we are made for Him. Jesus did not just give you a “get out of hell free” card, He paid in blood for you to live a life of freedom here on earth! “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free!” -Galatians 5:1 If you received Jesus’ gift of salvation you can experience this freedom today, because Jesus paid for it. You have free access to the Source of everlasting freedom, love, joy and peace-found in Christ alone. Activation: Say this with me: Father, here I am! I know that I am precious to you. Thank you for loving me today.” Now, just sit still for a moment. Do you feel Him loving you? Take a few minutes to identify areas of your life where you are not experiencing this freedom yet, areas where you feel bound. Then take time to lay them down before the throne and listen to what God is saying to you about how He wants to change your life. Declaration: “I was designed for freedom in Christ, not for bondage!” “I don’t have to earn freedom, Jesus already paid for it on the cross! I simply get to receive it as a gift by entering His presence.”
Vote 2020
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